How does mindfulness work?
Mindfulness is banded around as a useful skill or tool to slow down and de-stress. To use as a method to work around our busy lifestyle and bring in an element of health, and yet for all the use the word has, I am often asked, “What is it?”
It’s a difficult question for me to answer because mindfulness can mean different things to different people, and we are all different. Some of us have a constant chatter in our heads and can use mindfulness to focus that chatter to a subject, while others are able to quieten their mind to a level where that is no sounds or thoughts. Some have lists constantly being added to or items taken off, others have repeated events and things they should have said or done going on.
Mindfulness is the ability to quieten the mind, to a certain extent, allowing thoughts to come in and gently, with compassion, refocus on the present moment and notice things without judgement and with self-compassion or love. It can be a few minutes practice or it can be a regular ritual, as I am about to tell you. I would like you to take a few moments and imagine you are there watching her go through this little routine my nan had.
My nan used to love pink scented roses.
When she had saved enough money, she would walk down to the local market, on a Thursday. On her way she would hum little tunes, smile down at me as I would hold her hand and talk to me about the sights and smells we would likely find there. After we had finished collecting the items she wanted, we would make our way to the flower stall.
The florist was a friendly, burly kind of gentleman. He would say things how he saw them. But he had a special smile and greeting for his regulars. My nan was one of his regulars and he would greet her with a big grin that would go up into his eyes and into his voice. She would smile to him and tilt her head slightly. After asking after his family, missus and general things, the stall holder would allow me to pick one flower out for myself. A few minutes later they would direct their conversation to the flowers my nan would like.
Scented pink roses would always be the choice. My nan would take her time to smell each one and hand them to the florist, as he patiently held the ones she had picked. Then he would wrap them up and hand them to her. They would smile their goodbyes, like they were old friends, and she would totter back to her flat.
At home, she would make a brew and carefully lay them out on the kitchen table, then take her time arranging them in her mum’s cut glass vase. I didn’t talk to her as she did this, and she would hum to herself with a beautiful smile that lit her entire face up. Then when she was finished, she would smell them and ask if we wanted a chocolate biscuit from her secret stash.
During that entire time, my nan had learnt how to be mindful and present in the moment. She slowed down, spent time with what was immediately around her and expressed her joy and love for the simple things. Mindfulness can be a fleeting moment, or it can be an enjoyable act. It is up to you how you fit it in.
If you are interested in mindfulness, I run a monthly session at Revive All.
Details can be found at www.reviveall.co.uk